Dude! Watch your step!

I turn the ignition on after fumbling for the keys and check my watch. 9.11. Sigh! Five minutes late again (comparing it to the time I left home yesterday morning which was five minutes later compared to the day before). There are a thousand things that are currently running in my mind aside of turning on the Bluetooth in my phone to sync the songs through the BT Audio in my car. The most prominent thought being the chaotic traffic I have to wade through to reach my client’s place, which is a good 12 kilometers from my abode.

I get off the slope running down my house and onto the main road, honking all the way through the five centimeters where the garbage is getting cleaned with the garbage van parked right outside the gate, mindless cyclists and pedestrians crossing blissfully while chattering over their handheld devices, whatever they may be. Upon my successful haul onto the main road, I weave through and find a place to park my drive sandwiched between two autos parked angularly in a V-shape formation in front of me. I can’t really differentiate between Obtuse and Acute and it’s like telling me what’s the difference between a crow and a sparrow. I wouldn’t really bother. The signal turns green and there is absolute pandemonium. That sheer brilliance of steel packed in a Range Rover you admired, parked diagonally right across the puny little thing that you drive suddenly swerves to the left, leaving you right in the middle. Having followed all the rules namely, indicator blinking left, your parked car on the extreme left lane indicating that you are going to turn left and the very fact that you need to turn only either left or right because there is no straight permissible, you would expect to see some discipline from the others as well. Sorry to disappoint you. You are infallibly wrong. As I turn to my left (finally!!) with 5 seconds to spare in a 90 second signal where you are one of the first five vehicles parked (that is the extent of mayhem on the road), you enter the road to be encountered by a tourist taxi Indica charging at you at 60 kmph in that narrow stretch of pot-holed Government property. You somehow apply your brakes and pray that your ABS (Anti-lock braking system) for which you paid an extra 50 grand and settled for the top end model somehow serves the purpose.

 It saves you in the nick of time, after getting a disgusted look from him for no err of yours, and from the third gear you are back to the first and in this process, you break a sweat, release the clutch too fast and the ignition turns off. By the time you recover from all this tamasha and move a little more forward, an auto plunges into the main road from another narrow street from nowhere and lands right in front of you and moves at 20 kmph looking for ‘savaari’ translated as looking for people, for him to carry on his carrying business.

  

You successfully dodge him and land at another signal, thankfully ten minutes from all that fiasco. Ten minutes of a little more honking, braking, flooring, bull-dozing the two wheelers, getting bull-dozed by buses, participating in sans- trophy races before crashing on a speed-breaker and hurting the underbelly of your precious little drive.

Finally, ten minutes away from work you are held up at a signal that stretches to about 200 meters and encompasses vehicles of all shapes, sizes and designs possible. That is the stretch when you get to see a Bentley Mulsanne while an auto attempts to kiss it with its half broken headlight which is a 4x4 itself and where you see a Mini Cooper S standing behind a TVS 50 with its driver cum owner all padded up with headgear et all waiting for that change in the signal post to green from red to boom into his maximum speed of 40 kmph.

 As I turn right, with the indicator blinking right, a character of pure genius overtakes me on the right

and cuts me in the front and turns left and that is plausible only by a dude with two more loafers sitting behind him, giving me that condescending look because he is apparently cool for two reasons 1. He made me stop in my tracks, not because he is dashingly killingly handsome (Oh Please!) and 2. He has that ‘Cool dude’ factor for having flouted the rules and for some unfathomable reason that he must have known the driver of the MLA’s secretary’s aunt’s neighbor’s servant.

As you finally turn your car onto the driveway, one patti would spring up from nowhere inches before your car’s bonnet like a suicide bomber and make u brake just by a show of hand. You have to oblige to that frail woman and not honk or give her a dirty stare as you are suddenly reminded of your great grandmother and think what you would do if she were alive and in the same situation as this patti. Pah!

While at the signal, you would get a myriad of entertainment. From office-going aunties wearing socks on their hands to prevent from getting tanned, to bunches of college and school students, holding hands and chatting all the way, texting and crossing the road, oblivious to the attention they are drawing towards themselves. You can spot these guys who are probably stick figures wearing clothes to accentuate the gravitational effect, who ride massively huge beasts like the Kawasaki Ninja, Honda CBR and Yamahas (which are brilliantly fast vehicles). When they pass by you after the signal, they are inconspicuous by then and sometimes you wonder whether they are holding on to the handlebars just to hold themselves lest they should be gone with the wind. However the best of the lot are always the well-built Iyer mamas with a kudumi returning from a homam, wearing huge pattais with their madisaar maami sitting behind them, in a Yamaha Fazer. That is by far the best thing you would have ever noticed. A sheer contrast of cultures, though hilariously funny, is the truth and a trend that’s growing big.

This has been my experience on most of the days I drive (which is 7 out of 7). The disheartening sight of people mindlessly crossing the roads while engrossed in their own world over their phones, absolutely reckless driving and carelessly defying the rules as if to scoff at them for their existence. It is high time we, as souls who exist and survive to LIVE our lives in this amazing country, started aping the west in lane discipline and traffic sense as well and not just live-in relationships and Gucci bags. Cleanliness begins with oneself. So does discipline. With the significant rise in the traffic population, it is essential for every road user to be aware of his roles and responsibilities. It is urged that every organization educate its employees and come down heavily upon those who disregard the rules and the set-up in frame. It is absolutely necessary that the Government organizes camps especially for Auto-drivers (includes share autos who are a tad worse), for in my sight they seem to be the most careless and recklessly ruthless road users who still are the very few sects who imbibe the age old Caveat Emptor (Customer is King). If the rider wishes to stop in the middle of the road, so will he stop there, not attempting to be slightly bothered at the disturbance caused to at least a hundred vehicles behind his’.

There needs to be a tightening on the provision of licenses issued to such drivers and nobody has the right to put the life of another in peril. It is really disturbing to see accidents day in and day out due to the sheer spoof of the entire system of regulations meant to be followed. I re-take the pledge I have taken all these years. “I shall drive and use the road (even while not driving) sensibly and learn to keep my ear, brain and eyes open and shall strive constantly to ensure that I cause the least disturbance to fellow road –users”. I would urge every single one of you to take this pledge and adopt it as part of your routine for you, will see that the rate of accidents plummet and then co-existing in absolute harmony will turn out to be a reality.

I am now two minutes away from office. One cyclist vigorously cycling on the wrong side swerves and enacts to me a vintage Bombay Circus stunt. He scrambles across the median and lands one centimeter away from me, scratches my bonnet with his Lance Armstrong skills and says to a bewildered me, scrunching his face, “Yen maa. Vootla solltu vantiya??”

References:

Photos: Photos have been lifted from the internet, and one blog in particular - http://chennairoads.wordpress.com/category/chaos/ 

Why on earth should I wear a saree for my wedding?

I have somehow always posed this question to myself and the ROW (Rest of the world) and somehow I have always been reprimanded for the harmless little question threatening to rock the very fundamentals of the “tradition” and “value systems” of a cult. Again, let me ask you the same damn question. Why should I wear a saree for my wedding? Those six (or in some phenomenally varied cult cases, nine) yards of silk spewn around me like I were a spindle across which the thread bobs and chokes to make me suffocate on my own wedding? Well, I did hear a mouthful when I asked the same question back home. So I thought I could safely ask you.

Yeah yeah I know traditions are meant to be followed. “Tradition”, the very genesis symbolizes this which I picked up from Wiki “A tradition is a belief or behavior passed down within a group or society with symbolic meaning or special significance with origins in the past. Common examples include holidays or impractical but socially meaningful clothes (like lawyer wigs or military officer spurs), but the idea has also been applied to social norms such as greetings. Traditions can persist and evolve for thousands of years—the word "tradition" itself derives from the Latin tradere or traderer literally meaning to transmit, to hand over, to give for safekeeping.” Ah! Wiki is a savior. Just because something was a way of life doesn’t mean it has to be necessarily followed. That’s what it says right? Ask anybody (in fact ask yourselves). Would you still trot around in a bear flesh or raw tiger skin (unless you are vying at an exquisite piece of overpriced Gucci or a Prada) just because it was how the “tradition” was way back then? Definitely not. Anyway, coming back to the topic. Jeez this seems hard. You know this is the problem. I have heard so many pros about draping a saree and the very fact that am questioning this seems so quizzical, like am trying to be rebellious for the sake of it. And worst of all, I can’t really think much. When I was just attempting to write this piece of section, I happened to ask a few friends for a few pointers. All of them. Every single one of them said “Oh God Sarees are the in thing”, “Name one girl who isn’t hot when she is draped in a saree” “Sarees are so in vogue” and finally “Dude what is wrong with you?” The traitors! Anyway, the thing is Sarees are not my thing. I was born a girl but reared as a boy. Jumping walls, playing GI Joe, trading WWF Cards, being besties with guys has been the story of my life. So yeah. It is creepy to imagine myself in a long straight piece of cloth knotted and tied with the aid of more cloth in the most uncomfortable of places is something that is going to be a bit of a situation for me when my getting married seems to be a little bit of a bigger shock. Somehow, probably due to all the westernization I became this weird you may say but to quote myself in French, “C’est moi” (That’s me!)

I sure hope that there are a few of you who would rather get married happily in a pair of Levis’ Denim replacing Devagiri and embrace Reebok rather than Raw Silk. For all those who prefer a Khakhi over Kanjivaram and simple tees over Sabyasachi (Damn! I can’t even get to pronounce half the types), try crying out to your bosses (aka elders at home). It’s high time we learn to respect what we want and “Evolve” as a race which respects it’s space and learns to adopt certain new practices as we strive to achieve a balance. Unless we ask for it, unless we cry for our independence we wouldn’t get it.
Saree for my wedding? Well. Hope not :)

Break the barriers

“Arre!! Kya hua Bhaiyya!!” “Enna da aachu” “Emandhi babu” “Yaenri aayithu” “Endhaa aayinnu” and many many more…
We would have all heard this somewhere or the other. Research psychology says that people usually mix and move with people mostly with some commonality- be it language, religion, or whatever other commonalities that appeals to the eye and the brain. We always want to be seen, spoken to, given importance to and to be understood. However, not many realize that the art of being accepted lies in the mere social interaction. Be it a simple wave, a smile or a ‘Heyyyy Sup?’.

Workplace is no different. It is rather way too complicated to be explained, or for that matter, even to be understood. Anything you do or say is always under the radar. The people you talk to, how you talk, how you carry yourself. Well if you’re silent, that gives a completely different picture as well. However the picture, a portrait of your persona it will be.

That’s where workplace ethics comes in. it’s not merely confined to the ‘Ethics and Communication’ we have all read as part of the Curriculum for our various competitive examinations. Hold on. Don’t despise me right away. I see I have been pretty cryptic right from the start, so let me get straight to the point.

Ethics is an ocean. What is right to you, would in all probabilities be wrong or perceived differently by your friend or colleague. For example, You decide to escalate something that you haven’t felt good about which is quite a sensitive issue. However, your friend feels that escalating the issue might not be the right stand to take since it is by nature, sensitive. He suggests you give it time for things to settle. However you opine that if you are unable to take the issue higher, it would probably only get worse. This is a kind of ethical dilemma we are always faced with.

Escalation of issues is a very critical aspect in every employee’s career. Any issue where he/ she feels something isn’t right should be communicated to their superiors or higher authorities. You might have a problem with a co-worker or a peer and you may have differences in work. Why the escalation is important is 1. To give vent to any trouble you have been experiencing to an independent party who will definitely be able to help. 2. If there is a problem, it will be ensured that it is not repeated. That issue will come to light only when you express your problem.

What you talk, when and how is of utmost importance. On the professional front, if something is mis-communicated, it has a profound impact on the rest of your career. As I mentioned earlier, all of us are always under the radar. Every one of us is different from the other. I may enjoy Rock and Jazz more than Classical music or I may enjoy playing outdoor games rather than PC games. That’s just me. We can play ‘spot the differences’ between you and me and we can point out a minimum of 100!!

When you and your friend are in sync with each other, you may just share the same frequency and when you don’t with another colleague or friend, it simply means you are not interested. Of course we all know that! The question is what do we do about the people whom we don’t talk to? In a corporate setup, it is natural to find that sometimes you do feel all alone and left out when you find everyone else having an identity or a group where they belong.  That identity is what is not yours; rather it is what is thrust upon you. A healthy corporate work-balance is initiated and propelled when colleagues treat others with respect and the vicious cycle of condescending behavior and ego are shattered.

Ethics in this current day scenario may be a term highly abused. Though it is in the eyes of the beholder, it applies to individuals for the betterment of themselves. Ultimately, what are rules for? We have an Ethical Standards Board in almost every single professional field and institution. Despite that, why is there an increase in the number of such issues? When a person tries to be sagacious, he does tend to be effervescent and goes a little overboard with his knowledge. Ethical skills should not be confused with the skills a person possesses. They are two worlds entirely. However, ethics while expressing your knowledge falls into the domain where it means “What you say, Say it Ethically and say it Right”. If you are having problems at the work front when you think you have been an unanticipated victim of a lack of ethic sense towards you, then the best way out would be to deal with it. How you deal with it will be how you define ethics to yourself and the others around you. A sketchy outline may never get you things staring right at your face. Drilling down to the core of the issue will always fetch more viable solutions that may plausibly provide long term solutions. Ethical principles are forever dynamic and are always subject to change with the radical changes in human rationale, but the fundamentals always remain intact. There are various literatures across the globe trying to define this one concept. Paper presentations, councils and projects worldwide are continuously striving to derive additional meaning from this one term. I just commenced my search into the depths of this term. It’s a long way to go and hopefully some day we will reach a consensus. Cheers to that!!

Bibliography: www.google.co.in